The Real Talks That Determine The Quality of Your Relationship...Part2

Good day peeeeople!!

Been a while! How have you been? Hope good!!
I apologise for the slight delay in posting Part2 of The Real Talks That Determine The Quality of Your Relationship…

Actually…I didn’t wanna rush my thoughts so it took me a while to put it together!

Hope it’ll be worth your wait!*wink*

Ok so….moving on to the next question on the real talks between you and your partner…

5. Can we talk to each other about anything?

Now you need to understand that when I say anything…I mean EVERYTHING!

From your past..or even present fears,insecurities,expectations,experiences…to your dreams,goals…or pursuits…and the list goes on!

Well…If the answer is no…you will have to discuss the reasons…and then work on creating…or maintaining a bonding&open environment that will foster the open communication!

I know this could be hard for some couples…especially for men/women who aren’t exactly vocal….but the truth is…if you are gonna see yourselves as partners/even confidants for life…then you need to begin by being friends…eventually…and hopefully…the best of friends!

6. What does love mean to you?
 Yeaaah…..I know! LOL! It’s a tricky….but yet..a very vital question!

If you must know…honestly..this question helps you both be on the same page about love!

Love is actually a choice and it’s unconditional! If two people feel differently about this…then there’s no way the relationship will last through the storms!

Couples have their perception of what love is…and it’s important that your partner’s perspective is in sync with yours!

Truth be told….as humans…one could get selfish in your expectations of love from your partner& that’s why when this question is discussed…it helps you understand your partner better…and of cos…love your partner the right way!

 7. What are your expectations of love and our relationship?

Actually…this question is like an annex to question6.

Well…this question will help you both clearly understand the positive and negative motives for being together!
What might seem as a positive motive on your part could be seen as negative to your partner!

Truthfully…we all come from different backgrounds &even though what brings us together in a relationship are the common values we observe in our partner….there are still some perceptions…teachings…or even experiences while growing up…that need to be explicitly shared with our partner for the benefit of appreciating your partner and being in a true and purely open relationship!

8. Do you believe a relationship requires hard work or should it be easy?

Hmmm….if you and your partner believe that a relationship needs to be continuously worked on/maintained…then it’s good to know you are on the same page....but if both of you can’t agree a real relationship requires hard work….then you need to address your differences!

As the saying goes…"A relationship…or even love…is like a flower! It needs to be watered…nurtured…unless it’ll wither & die!”

It’s a saying that helps you understand how to appreciate your partner…like a flower! You need to admire your partner…water/shower your partner with love…everyday…every other day….once a week…once a month…or else??

Yeah…your guess is as good as good as mine! The relationship…or love…might not die but it will wither!

9. Do our core values and beliefs repel or compel each other?

Truth be told…we all have values that direct us and help us make decisions—those beliefs that are fundamental to how we are wired… guiding our actions, thoughts, plans and purpose here on earth!

Now,the problem is most of us have never articulated what those values really are! And if you don’t know your values, how can you expect your partner to have a clue??

These values go beyond just your stated religion. Two people who are following Christ can still have some different core values that tangibly direct their decisions!

For example…using a scenario where one partner believes that going to church every Sunday makes him a total or even complete Christian…and then the other feels she not only attends church every Sunday but most importantly communicates to God daily & lives in the ways of God!

Actually..you could have a high value for responsibility and the person you’re dating could have a high value for risk!
Both values are good and not necessarily incompatible…but if not articulated and discussed, it could be a point of high conflict if the responsible person likes consistency and persistence, while the risk-taker likes changing things up and going for what seems the impossible!

As a matter of fact...too many relationships/marriages start (and even end) with vague and un-identified core values!

Having this in mind, the earlier you share your beliefs/values with your partner…the better for the relationship/marriage!

10.What do you think we can do to make our relationship better?

Lastly….this is a question to really listen to each other and after hearing each other’s suggestion, opinion …and even advice…you can now take your relationship to another level by working together as one to enhance what you have and make it better!!

Ok guys…this ends the Real Talks I think a couple should have to determine the quality of their relationship….!

I hope my post ...in some way...inspires & encourages you..&i wish you all the best in your relationship/marriage!

Gotta go now...but please feel free to drop your comments/additions to the post...and share with your family,friends on facebook,twitter,,bb..wateva....most importantly..Live,Love,Laugh...and remain blessed!